Leadership Out of the Box

I’ve been thinking and reading about leadership these last few months. As a timely coincidence, a friend this week suggested I read “Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box” by The Arbinger Institute.

Here’s a quick summary:

The premise of this book is that we often exist in a state of self-deception where we over inflate our own virtues and diminish the virtues of others. In this state—described in this book as being “in the box”—we view ourselves as superior, better leaders, better workers, better spouses, better friends, etc.

When in the box, we’re prone to blaming others and fail to see how we sabotage relationships and workplace results to justify our own need to feel superior. Also, while in this self-deceived state, we often don’t see people as people. Instead, we use mental shortcuts to categorize them. At work, we may think of co-workers as lazy, selfish, lacking business sense, unmotivated, disengaged, etc. Conversely, we view ourselves as hardworking, dedicated, productive, smart, fair, etc. If only this company had more people like me, we think, we’d be in great shape.

This book suggests that we enter this state of self-deception at work by failing to honor a commitment to achieving results. We unconsciously sabotage results to support our inflated view of ourselves. To get out of the box requires a selflessness and a focus on honoring the needs of others.

End of summary.

From a leadership development perspective, this book suggests we need to create selfless leaders who are focused on results and supporting the needs of co-workers. Individuals with big egos, often the type of people who are selected for leadership roles, may sabotage results to support their inflated views of themselves.

Postscript: The Steve Jobs Conundrum

There comes a point in every book I’m reading about leadership where I think “but what about Steve Jobs?” Wired magazine wrote an expose about how Steve Jobs can be, at times, the boss from hell. He’s been known to make Apple employees cry. (I commented on this in a past post.) And yet, as supreme leader of Apple, Steve Jobs’ value to the company is estimated to be in the billions of dollars. If Mr. Jobs were to leave the company, you can expect the share price of Apple to plummet. When people discuss Steve Jobs, no one questions his leadership.

I don’t mean to pick on Mr. Jobs. Many successful leaders have this same leadership style. But, in “Leadership and Self-Deception: Getting Out of the Box,” this top-down leadership through threats and coercion approach is used as an example of leadership in the box. Once the company tyrant sees the light and gets out of the box, his or her leadership style becomes gentle and supportive. The leader becomes an enabler to the success of others.

Studying leadership is often like eating soup with a fork. You get some good bits, but most dribbles through in the form of exceptions to all the rules.

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